A desperate Society

In a shared taxi I was sitting in the back seat and in the front chair next to the driver was a middle aged woman. On the way a car passed by our taxi in a very risky way. Our driver shouted at him and uttered a curse wishing, " this would be your last trip". Meaning wanted him dead. The woman sitting in the front chair criticized the driver, saying: you shouldn't say it. The driver replied angrily: He might have hit us and you may have been killed. What the woman said left me astonished. She said, I wish the sooner God would perish me. I commented in a way that all other passengers would hear."What a broken society we are living in that a woman at this age is desperately wishing death for herself”!? A man around 40 sitting next to me, looking like a pro-state, said, it is our own shortcomings. He continued, “the people running our country think of us as sheep, for even a donkey will never fall into the hole twice. Just look at that Ukrainian, they suffered one million casualties (!?) in the war, why don't we send this regime out even though one million get killed?”. It was a heartbreaking moment for me. I am not very well educated on other nations' history, but I doubt if ever a nation has experienced what we are facing now. Later in history, scarcely one could ever believe what is going on here has truly happened, only it could be possibly compared with Jonestown.

Iran Israel 12-day-war

 It is not difficult to realize what is happening between Iran and Israel today: there is a group of people who happen to rule Iran. This tiny group has been publicly chanting "Death to Israel" for 46 years and openly want Israel to be wiped off the face of the earth.

Whereas this group's behavior in recent years, including arming Hezbollah, Hamas, and the Houthis in Yemen and launching hundreds of small and large missiles at Israel, which also happened to be manufactured by this group, shows that their demands have gone beyond slogans and are actually preparing for the annihilation of Israel. 

Now that influential countries in the world order have come to believe this group will be able to build nuclear weapons in the near future, they are determined to ensure that such a dangerous weapon does not fall into the hands of those who are willing and prepared to destroy Israel.

Unlawful life

Yesterday early in the afternoon I decided to visit a relative confined in hospital. Using a shared taxi I had to wait some time for the car to be filled. The weather was hot, actually hottest part of the day in hottest days of the year. This kind of taxi is commuting in a controlled route with a certain fare labeled on the top corner of front glass. A young man seemingly to be in hurry told the driver that he pays for two persons. So, the driver, a tall bearded dark man around 45 with green eyes who was standing in a distanced shadow did not have to wait any longer. He came and we, I mean me sitting in front and the young man who is to pay for two and a woman at her late 30s began a journey which I never ever thought to be like what I will be telling you in coming words.

On the way the young man at the back wanted to get off and asked for how much he should pay. The driver told him a price which was more than what was stated on the label that was hidden behind the front shade. I asked the driver why he charges more than the usual price. He said in a law voice, "It is al right".

I said, "I do not get you"

Driver: "It is the rate".

I: "But it is stated in the label (I was saying this while lifting up the shade) something less".

Driver: "you can call 1888 and complain".

I: "Why should I complain (I had the experience that would lead me to no where)? From the beginning I won't pay in excess".

Driver: "Do it if you want to eat "Haram".

This I should explain to my non-Muslim readers that Haram is a religious expression used to denote any thing which is forbidden for a Muslim to do. Like eating Pork, drinking wine, accepting bank interest, unlawful earning and etc.

I: "Why do you bring this issue to a religious concept? The label says you are charging more than approved rate".

Driver: the approval is out of date.

I: "This is printed in current year".

Driver: "We drivers have objection against it".

I: "So, your objection is not met yet and you raised your rate and you say you are not doing Haram but if I pay you with the approved rate I am dong Haram? I damn this Ideology you believe in".

Driver: "You do not need to pay".

I: "I pay what I should pay which is your approved fee".

At this time he was already shouting that the taxi administration officers have personal grudge with their representative and that is why their tariff did not increase for the current year. He was cursing the taxi organization forcing him to argue with passengers while he is fasting and suddenly started to slap himself to his face. I was really shocked. I told him, "I am just reminding you regulations and you beat yourself". But by this he pressed the pedal brake dangerously in a way that the head of lady at my rear came almost close to my ear. While looking at me angrily I felt I am sitting next to a beast. He looked fearful. Green eyes with a very dark skin covered with perspiration and smoke from cars' exhaustions. He said, "You insulted the Imams and Koran"! What he said added to his power terrifying me, because he now had the state's power at his back. I said in a calm voice, "Did I"? He said, "Yes, you insulted the Koran". I said, "No, I did not insult the Koran, I only said I damn what you believe in". Then he again started to beat himself but this time he was punching to his face and head.

By now his voice and its tone were changed. He was almost crying. He was repeating that the situation is getting harder and harder. I was chocked with tears. I told him that I only was trying to do my duty as a citizen. I brought his head closed to me and kissed his cheek. He also kissed my face and for a moment we kept silent. I was already closed to my destination and paid him a little more than the official rate. He did not want to accept. He said, I did not want to get from you more from the beginning but since you spoke loudly I feared the other passengers would notice.

I said good bye to him and asked him to control himself in similar situations to come. He responded in a very polite positive answer, "Chashm".

Undisciplined disciplinary forces

Yesterday was my day off. My daughter had just finished university examinations and my son too was in a good mood to accompany us (he rarely voluntarily goes shopping with us). We had planned to buy our lunch outside thus my wife did not have to worry about cooking as well. All in all we had started a good day, we thought!

Before leaving the house I reminded my daughter not to wear anything that causes trouble regarding disciplinary forces' maneuver over Hejab or Islamic costume concerns. Doing so she reviewed all her old and new cloths and she even did not care much about fashion. She wore just a set of plain black pants, dress and a yellow scarf. Even so, right after entering the Hyper star Mall, two women disciplinary forces (it is how the police is named after Islamic revolution) wearing a dark veil (Chador) stopped us and questioned my daughter. While touching her manteau one of them said that it was short and why the sleeves were folded. I was carefully listening so for the next time we observe them too, although I really felt we were offended by this but had no other choice except to be obedient. Complying with a Persian poem:

In the hands of a bloodthirsty lion

What preference remains but submission?

Listening carefully to what they were saying, their man colleague a bit farther called on me that I should stay away. I replied, "This is my family". He repeated "Get distance". This time I shouted at him, "But I am listening to avoid such incident for next time". In seconds I found myself surrounded by five or six uniformed disciplinary officers. They were warning me to calm down while two of them continuously pushed me with one hand. I told the two, one by one "stop pushing me". One of them said in a rude tone, "Why you got mad?" I reminded him that he should be polite. Then he said, "You are impolite". We were interrupted by my wife's yelling at them. She was screaming while shaking severely. Later she told me that they had threatened to detain our daughter. She wailed, "My husband has been in battle field and you are doing this to him while you are under air-conditioned." One of them around 30 years old replied, "I was there too". I thought he most have been there for elementary school since the war ended when he was still a child. There were people stopping and watching our confrontation but they were instructed by uniformed police to not gather round. Subsequently we were guided out of the occurrence's site and the flow of people continued toward the stairs heading to the mall. I looked back and told them, "This is not the right way to govern the country." We almost were out in the parking lot that my daughter went back and told the two disciplinary women that," Are you Iranians? To God I swear you are not Iranians". This time I was really afraid for the first time and was sure that we will be taken to custody. But surprisingly nothing happened. I think they were not bothered by calling them Aliens. In the parking I found out the one who managed bringing us out of the lobby into Parking area was a high ranking officer, he said that they are forced to do this although do not believe in what they do. He had sympathetic approach and I thought he had to play the good man there. I told him they (the disciplinary forces there) were not trained enough. They should be disciplined. They were really behaving more like thugs than Police forces.

In the whole event my son was quiet. First I was happy for this. Obviously I did not want him to get in trouble. But then I noticed how well the Islamic republic's strategies had been successful in schools and other aspects of life making him and youth like him obedient and harmless citizen for a totalitarian system.

Who knows? He may respond against a foreign assault the same, similar to how the Iranian people and Army behaved during Sassanid period against the Arab invasion.

Upside down

On the way to office I have chosen a new route. It is quicker and cheaper. But the problem is the insecurity in parts of the way, I mean there is possibility of accident with cars. I thought if some of top city officials were used to walk, there may be less messy path for walkers.

Just close to my destination, there are busses and minibuses always parked. One of them has a sign on it written in Chinese characters (or ideographs). I have seen this sign on many cars. Interestingly at all times affixed upside down. I should explain I know a bit Japanese writings which are in some ways like Chinese. This time I saw two men talking near this minibus. For a short while I waited with the hope to find the owner of the vehicle. Fortunately one of them was the owner. I asked him if he knows the meaning of the sticker put on his car. "No", he said. I reminded him it is up side down. He said, "Really? I did not know it. Let's have breakfast". He said this while pointing to the bread he was holding. I continued walking, the next car had a machine made carpet depicting Fardin, the most famous cinema celebrity during the Shah's era on his chair. The super star who was not allowed to act rest of his life after the 1979's revolution. He was one of the few well known movie celebrities who did not escape the country after the enormous changes that reaped the country in all aspect of life mainly culturally. And no one really cared for his years of absence in the Iranian cinema there after. Until his death that media talked about him and some folks like this bus driver remembered him by putting a carpet portraying his picture –captured while in fame- on his seat. Another minibus had a French flag sticker on the side window and two Persian soldiers on the door.

In the evening when I came home I found the atmosphere unusual. Little by little my wife and my son started to explain what had happened. My wife had been shopping in a grocery and bought some goods and the shop keeper gave him chocolate instead of her change. My wife did not want to accept a chocolate replacing her money and the shopkeeper got angry and did not want to sell her anything at all. She came home angry and my son together with his friend went to the said shop to discuss the matter. Now I was frozen for what I was hearing. What went wrong in my family? Or better to say what is happening to this country? I just was thanking God that nothing serious happened. How about if they involve in physical contact? How about if they end up in police station and what if one of them get hurt and… etc.

When I started my day I never thought my day may end like this, even though everything should be expected living in a country like Iran, anything.

A day in Tehran- Anything sacred,

Today is Friday, a sacred holiday in Muslim world. Although I am not really sure how a Muslim community is reorganized to be one?! And I am a good example to portray this controversy; for I neither did nor see anything sacred today.

In the morning I brought my daughter to her Guitar class. She had a group practice preparing for a concert. I waited for her in the car near her school. The gas price is high and rationed so, I decided to wait there, and for filling my time brought with me Somerset Maugham’s “Of human bondage,” after almost a year that I had kept in the shelf.

It was not easy to find a good parking place, but after all I found one. While sank in the book the car in front of me trying to get out of park bumped me. So hurriedly, I distanced from him and complained,”why didn’t you tell me? Had you to strike me getting my attention?” He left without a word. An hour later a very chic and nose operated (you should see “Nose, Iranian style” by Oskuee) came close and asked without preliminary custom words, “How long are you waiting here?” I answered, “2.5 hours, why?” He said a car has bumped his car and a witness had left its number on his car. I now understood why the driver who had bumped me earlier did not pay attention to my complaining voice. I think he has also bumped his front car which was an expensive one and the strike had caused damage to the car so he seemingly preferred to run away instead of arguing with me.

My daughter came and on our way home in Shahrak Gharb (Now called Shahrak Qods) we saw several units of young police forces in groups of 20. I did not notice why they were there and told my daughter, ”This is the job generating course of action promised by Ahmadinejad’s government, to hire people to control other people!” Some cars were parked aside streets heading toward the walkway leaving a narrow space pass. Two or three cars bumped each other and seemed to be waiting for police. I told my daughter the situation brings an Armageddon genre movie in mind.

The weather was lovely. Sun shined as beautiful as possible, rarely Tehran is this clean. I thought this would be a loss not walking in this weather. I went out to have walk. Two young boys around 14 on two small motorbikes were approaching. Their outfits and old weary motors gave the impression they were not very privileged. They honked constantly looking as if to be so joyful. When they got closer one of them (looking like “Bashu” by Beizai) with a very warm smile looked at me and while putting his hand on his head yelled “Kachal” meaning, Bald. I am very sure he was right and I am a hairless middle aged man. But the problem is, what kind of teaching made him choosing this one among all beauties he could enjoy the day?

Iran, the kidnapped nation,

This morning I went to a police affiliated office to renew my passport. I had prepared all needed materials. After a short stay I was called to the window. A young lieutenant was on charge and I presented my document in a file. Right after opening my file he said, "This can not be.”

I asked, "what about.”

He said, "We can not accept your photo, because of your beard (I have a goatee beard since six years ago and even in my present passport’s photo I have the same beard), it is considered decorative."

I replied, "I feel you are insulting me.”

By this he became a bit uncomfortable and continued, "It is not us; it is the system" (which he meant administrative automation).

Now, I was getting irritated already and told him, "I don't give a damn to the system which does not recognize my beard.”

He said, "you can make it photo shopped".

I was so angry that my hand was shaking; I noticed it when I tried to put back my eyeglasses in its case.

I shouted, "What next? How far this will go? Why do you intrude to people's very basic right to decide for their personal affairs?" While pulling my beard down I continued, "Do you think if I take this off, your interference in our privacy will end? I do not think so."

Then I collected my documents and told them, "I do not want a passport,” and left the place.

On the way to office I was thinking about what happened and if what I did was proper. I remembered the way the women staffs in that office were staring at the whole event. They were working while they were covered by veil. I imagined they were questioning my silence as male country man who during the 1979’s revolution was old enough to have a part in law making which deprived women from their many basic rights legislatively, "How about this heavy costume we have on, is it not humiliating to force people choosing their outfits?"

I passed by young drivers who were calling, "Exhibition! Exhibition!” they knew there are among people who are going to visit Tehran's 24^th book fair. Millions visit the place every year. It is said to be one of the prominent book fair of the world. What a contradiction, I thought! How a nation who perpetrate such achievement can enforce these humiliating rules. Yet, it adds to more surprise to know the related authorities announced that one of the negative points of the book fair is many women did not observe the Islamic Hijab while visiting the fair. The national television also put on air an argumentative report last night, while showing women not observing Islamic outfit properly and criticized the fair’s environment.

Vagrantly I was roaming in the same route that I usually go hurriedly to have my last ride to office. I asked myself, who these people are ruling over us? Are they the upshot of a revolution’s emergency situation? What kind of law makers they are, or for whom they instruct bylaws that most of citizens are disobedient to them and their guidelines. But then, how a minority can rule forcefully over the majority? It can in fact, when a majority is not aware of being majority due to lack of communication means then, every particle of that greater part behaves as separated extreme minor elements. The monopolized mass media in the hands of ruling class which proved to be a mere minority not only compel its dogma in a great deal, also visibly and invisibly try to divide people and eradicate all roots that can unify people. Just for an instance we can now see there is no sport man, movie star, business man, artist, political figure even cleric, no one that can be an icon which people can surround him. This is not to say the present population dose not have the quality, no. I want to say the group in power, by all probable methods like technological, psychological, and even ideological teachings strive to depict being the only possible leadership option.

In the office I still had not been able to recover from the earlier shock. I spoke about it to some colleagues. Everyone had his or her own experience and commented on the issue.

One said, "To get passport for my 5 years old daughter, I was told to prepare a photo in which my daughter’s hair is covered entirely. And when I reminded them that she is only 5 years old and Islam dose not oblige women for Hijab before 9. They said this is one of their regulations.

Another woman colleague said, "So, now you know how difficult is to tolerate warnings we receive to move forth our scarves in a way that none of our hairs could be seen."

A young fellow whom I think is one of the intellectuals in our office told me that I should have told the officer, "By getting rid of my beard with photo shop, then that man is not me. And this is how a jungle like this we are living in is created."

An old employee said, "Why? Could there be any one whose beard is not decorative." He was referring to utilization of beard hypocritically in our society. After revolution not shaving beards began to be a sign of piety.

After all, I should confess this was the first time I started to think decisively of setting myself on fire. But this was not a proper thing to do. First, what my children will think of me? I always had told them to fight for life and only a coward commits suicide. Secondly, if I did so, there will be a huge propaganda that this man (me) suffered from mental disorders or was a depressed addict.

I was thinking how this started to happen and I recalled around 2-3 years after Islamic revolution when little by little the state began to ban women going to offices and shops without Hijab. That time no one cared seriously. I remembered this precious quote I received from liberty.com. And indeed it is.

"As nightfall does not come all at once, neither does oppression. In both instances, there is a twilight when everything remains seemingly unchanged. And it is in such twilight that we all must be most aware of change in the air - however slight - lest we become unwitting victims of the darkness."

(William O. Douglas 1898-1980).